The Mercy Of Allah(Swt) In Disguise- How A Sister Deal With Issues After Marriage
“If We had sent down this Qur’an upon a mountain, you would have seen it humbled and coming apart from fear of Allah. And these examples We present to the people that perhaps they will give thought. He is Allah, other than whom there is no deity, Knower of the unseen and the witnessed. He is the Entirely Merciful, the Especially Merciful.”
(Surah Al-Hashr, Verse No. 21 & 22)
I used to be an ordinary muslim girl. Sometimes worked as volunteer in halaqas(community), hanging around with friends, having fun within ethical limits, , occasional fasting, sometimes enlightening my nights with prayers, seeking forgiveness, expressing gratitude for my infinite blessing and good hopes from the King of all kings Allah (swt). A girl full of life. a girl who is loved by everyone, admired by people for leaving the duniya for the sake of Allah and loving the path of deen. Life was simple and happy. Yet something was missing. The person wasn’t here yet who was supposed to fulfill the half of deen :’)
Some of my background
I got married a year back. The person isn’t practicing but he performs basic obligations of religion. Sometimes we seek for a religious person and don’t give chance to them who might get inspired and turn to Allah(swt) even more. I wanted to give the person a chance after seeing some goodness. Within a month of marriage I realized that my husband had no interest in me. He just got married because he had to;due to age and social purpose. or as a tradition in of our culture.
There was no privacy thing at my in-laws house. Whatever happens between me and my husband, it was an open secret to whole family. even to the relatives far away in village. My husband was really very negligent towards me. His priority was his superb career, friends, his own family. There was no mental bond between us. After 2 months of marriage he went to abroad for studies. Our problems got severe and severe. He was never willing to discuss with me. He was obsessed with his mother and always used to discuss our personal matters with her. She misguided him the most. Her insecurities cut the root of our relation most. My nights changed into nightmare. the happy girl became a kind of psychic.
I was looking for solutions !
I was looking for solutions here and there like crazy. Lots of questions were roaming in my mind, lots of answers I was looking for. In between these tough situations and uncertainty I found Islam even more beautiful. I found lots of meaning that Allah wanted me to know. I started praying Tahajjud again, I begun to understand the family value and status of parents in our lives more, I started being less judgmental about people, I understood that every girl needs to have own identity, I started to adopt means to stand up on my own back instead of depending on parents. I started learning Arabic and attended Quran memorization classes. After performing multiple ishtekhara and praying for solutions to Allah, I came to know that my husband decided to divorce me.
After hearing this, I was not broken outwardly because I was already broken from inside long back. But Allah is the ultimate healer. He never left me for a while through my journey. Everybody always used to tell me that I am a soft person and I need to be stronger. I am not a person who would be able to hold these immense pains. But Allah always holds my heart.. Whenever I was about to collapse, I always felt a divine support who was holding me from collapsing and telling me “no you have to stand up! you can’t collapse”. Today I feel Allah(swt) is with me and He was never away. He was always with me :’).
Yes this test was a blessings for me
Yes this test was a blessings for me, because I have learnt that we may become highly religious but we never should feel self righteousness. We never should forget the story of “Barsissa”. Always stay humble and stay away from sins as much as we can. Build your relation with Allah and never sacrifice Deen for anyone else.. I respect my parents and look after them even more now Alhamdulillah. Isn’t these things are forms of blessings? Allah doesn’t hate us. His love for us is immense. He wants good for us. During trials always keep making dua and never ever doubt Allah’s mercy. He is there, always there for you…..for me……
“And your Lord says, “Call upon Me; I will respond to you”.
(Surah Ghafir, Verse No, 60)
May Allah SWT bless all Muslim brothers and sisters with happiness in their family life!
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