In a married life, understanding is the key ingredient to make it work or in a good functional state. Here a question arises, how to get the best understanding among two people who are coming from the different status, mindset or perhaps countries. Islam has made this query so easy to comprehend as it is said:
“The best amongst you is the one
who fear Allah.”
Now, back to the term ‘understanding’.It can be seen in a situation when two people fear Allah and aiming ‘jannah’ as their final destination then their companionship becomes parallel, they go hand in hand like any enthusiastic team. The pious couple who are watchful to their acts and they think of the ‘Day of the judgement’ precisely would be more keen to bring his or her partner successfully until the finish line.
1 Pious partner is a good help:
As the line above states, household chores is sunnah of our beloved Prophet Muhammad ﷺ
On one occasion, Hazrat Ayesha (R.A.) said about Messenger that:
“He used to sewn His clothes
and mend His shoe himself”.
A good Muslim would always try to be a helping hand even it comes to household chores. He always makes allowances for his wife and whenever it is possible he shows his ‘man at work’ attitude.
If we apply this to the other way round, a wife that fears Allah will help her husband if he is in a financial crisis and boost the income through legal means because it is said that:
“Whatever a woman spends on her
the family will be marked as sadqa”.
2 Fear Allah keeps you from the fight:
A Muslim husband or wife can be fussy, argumentative, quarrelsome or annoying after all they are in a relationship that we call ‘marriage’. It is a well-known fact that a man can be egoist sometimes and don’t agree on mere facts, or we can say that a woman tries to convince others on her each opinion. In such condition, even a small gesture of frisson can lead to sudden outbursts of undue emotions. Our beloved Prophet has explained and given us the best guidance in this regard. He said that:
“Among the believer who shows perfect faith are those who have the best disposition and are kindest to their families.”
In the light of the above saying, a person who fears Allah will try to save the dispute and shows his anger in a constructive way. Instead of having an argument such a couple will resolve into something that will bring them even closer.
3 Your partner would be your guide:
Now we take a look from a different angle. For instance, consider a couple in which a husband is dutiful in worshipping Allah but the wife is not so active. In this case, a fearful husband would become a guard for his wife and sees that she offers her prayers and make dua timely and properly. One verse of the Quran is:
“A man is answerable to his family”
If one is lucky enough in selecting a spouse who fears Allah would be beneficial for him/herself ultimately. Obligatory ‘ibadah’ is the ideal momentum in keeping a person fit for the daily routine. Doubtless, a fixed routine is a necessary aspect in making a married life perfect.
4 Fear Allah keeps you in shape:
This is the duty and utmost responsibility of a person in the marriage to keep oneself gracefully dressed up and in reasonable attire so that one remains attractive to his or her spouse.
In the Quran Allah says:
“When a husband and wife look at each other with love, Allah look at them with mercy.”
This hadith shows that the love and bond between spouse are the factors to get Allah (s.w.t.)’s mercy. Here it is important to mention that Islam teaches a lot about marital affairs.
For a believer who wants Allah’s mercy will try to have the meaningful existence of him in his married life or vice versa. Even physical appearance does matter and guided by the noble religion of Islam.
5 Fear Allah makes a marriage stronger:
In the ‘khutbah’ of nikah the last verse is:
“Speak only what is right.”
This is the most important advice given to the newlywed couple. Most of the conflicts take place just by the wrong use of the words. Words can make or break any relation. Words can be the root cause of our most of the problems. On the application of this advice, the righteous spouse will be more truthful, he will look into the matter before passing any judgement fearing to utter any unjust words. He will try not to hurt the feelings of the spouse by the wrong use of his tongue. He will never look down upon his wife. He will give her the right opinion.
He will keep his tongue from the unrightful. He will keep his relation in a trustworthy fashion so that he would not need of telling a lie and prevent his tongue from it.
Since marriage is a two-way process same rules will be followed by a lady who has been tied a knot to a fair Muslim. Our beloved Prophet once said:
“ The woman who dies in the state of her husband being pleased with her will enter Jannah(paradise).”
6 Fear Allah emits a loyal spouse:
Allah wants happiness for the mankind so he applies a number of self-correction duties on a Muslim. This becomes the secret of a person to nourish his or her life, even to one’s lifestyle after marriage.
If we take ‘salah’ for example all we need to have is concentration, loyalty and attention towards Allah, we keep in our mind that he is listening to our prayers if we put the effort in it by keeping our focus in one direction. A person who always offers his or her prayer get caught in the idea of being loyal, he becomes habitual of concentrating and paying attention that is before him or her, a training of being sincere penetrates in him or her. Such couples when seeing any upsetting in their married life they start judging themselves. They ensure to practise their instinct that is being sincere before drawing any result.
The man has permission to remarried four times with the obligation of being just with each wife in every way.
Allah says in the Noble Quran:
“Marry those who please you of(other) women two or three or four. But if you will not be just, then (marry only); one.”
A person who fears Allah in true sense will think again and again before remarriage because the demand for justice is coming right from the One who is the justest. So, he will try to make his current marriage work and guide his wife in order to be a good wife gently because one has to be careful of his words, too. When Allah says to be just to your wife, it offers everything time, money, strength, energy, plans and the list goes on.
And the story doesn’t end here, a lady has the same obligation. She has to perform her duties regarding her marriage with more attention and subtleness. A lady who fear Allah is guided through many verses and quotes of ‘hadith’ that she has to be available for her husband so that he can enjoy the privilege that is due to his legal wife. She should be more careful with her time she must see that she is utilising it to bring something fruitful to her husband or she is going to repent for it.
7 Fear Allah makes you the nicest to your family:
Generally, it is seen that people are mannerful, gentle and polite in the gatherings, but they don’t know what is going on in the head of their spouse sitting next to them. Sometimes rudeness holds back the spouse to talk openly and sharing the ideas that linger in one’s heart.
Once Hazrat Ayesha (R.A.) was asked about the character of Prophet Muhammad(p.b.u.h). She said:
“Anything that is in the Quran was his character.”
Fear Allah becomes the blessing for the married couple. When Prophet Muhammad demonstrates such treatment towards his family then a Muslim himself will follow the same pattern.
Moreover, fear Allah makes the heart soft to the family and a person gets ready to forgive one’s mistake of keeping in mind that on the day of judgement Allah will reward him or her. A Muslim knows that the spouse is the one, who deserves the most, one’s good behaviour. Kindness is the duty or obligation of every Muslim but family deserves kindness the most which become another pillar in securing the marriage.
8 Fear Allah and spouse respect:
Allah orders to respect spouse through his one verse that says:
“They (your wives) are a clothing(covering) for you and you too are a clothing(covering) for them.”
In this verse, the garment is something that adorns and hides the ugliness, the garment is the symbol of status and brings respect. A man who fears Allah keep his wife in a manner that brings respect to the family, he would really think of her as close as his garment, gives her the attention and respect which is always needed.
This verse is not only for a husband it implies to a wife as well. A lady who does fear Allah will show the dignity and respect for her husband. She maintains her relationship in such a manner that she wants only her husband by her side and nobody else. In this scenario, marriage becomes a blissful occasion of their lives and they would feel contented with their hearts.
9 Fear Allah makes the marriage intact:
Muslim has an opportunity to follow the beautiful journey of ‘sunnah’. Marriage is not the easy journey. Married couples will agree to this spontaneously. Fear Allah is the root that nurtures a Muslim and blossoms the flower of his marriage. When a Muslim has to be nice to the family, not get into arguments and fights, take care of the spouse’s every sort of need, give the respect, rush to help, must not discourage, has to be kind and be considerate for the happiness of the spouse then there is no chance that the marriage won’t flourish.
Fear Allah is the demand even for those couples who never think of its existence before. It is something that erases the difficulties and counsels the couple secretly. A Muslim that fears Allah submits to Him first and then make a connection to the spouse. He has the spirit to make his marriage to the way to Jannah for him as well as for his family members.
The noble Quran quotes:
“O who you believe save yourself from fire(of hell) and then your families.”
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