The relationship between husband and wife is completely based upon a few factors which if understood by both, make the relationship healthy and fruitful. It is always said that a house is only home if the woman plays her role as described by our deen(religion).
A woman, as a wife and as a mother holds great importance when it comes to the atmosphere of a house. It is in her hands to control the environment, to make it friendly or tensed. She is the mentor of a house.
For bringing up a peaceful environment in the house i.e. no arguments, quarrels, high tones, and anxiety; it is advised that a wife keeps a closer eye on the behavior towards her husband. She shall be patient in all situations. It depends on her how she gets along with the mood swings of her husband.
Even the children are highly dependent on their mother’s attitude towards her marital life. Not just the spouses, but the children too are affected by the relationship between the couple. Therefore, to make your marriage an ideal one, the wife has to practice one basic gesture that could save the marriage from big disasters and that is “RESPECT”.
Respect is simple yet the most difficult thing to give to somebody. People who are into less dignified jobs deserve less respect while those having lots of cash in their bank account shall be treated will all due respect. This is just the judgemental thought of our society; it holds no importance in shariah.
Let’s take the emotion of respect into an account of marriage. To promote a healthy married life, a woman shall give respect to her husband as this is the pillar of marriage. The following are some tips that show how and when she can practice this gesture in her daily routine.
1. Portray Him Through A Smile:
A wife shall behave respectfully towards her husband when they are in a gathering. In front of family members, she shall never complain about him; she shall show him how much he makes you happy by complimenting him.
Not only in front of relatives and family members, but also in front of children as a mother is the one who makes up the image of a father. She is responsible for the thought children carry for their father as he is busy earning for them.
A mother being a wife should be a pull between father and children. She should portray a respectful image of the father so the children would do the same.
2. Appreciate Him:
Appreciate the efforts he does for you. A wife shall never make the husband realize how bad he is at something that he is trying to do best over and over again. It could be work or it could be something that he does for your happiness like cooking.
Tell him the good part and not just point out the flaws. It will help him be better at it as well as your comments will help him.
3. Thank Him:
Thank him for the small things he does for you. You both live in the same house. There must be things that he does instead of you. Say ‘JazakAllah’ for those gestures. This is such a small yet meaningful thing to do. It will make him think that you note all of the little things he does for you.
Even if he does things that you don’t ask him to do then this needs extra appreciation for sure. As husbands are the fighters out of the house, so being a warrior at home should never be ignored. They always get happy even if they achieve a little out of too much.
4. Support Him:
Never let him stay stressed or tensed. Always be his support in hard times. A good wife shall always take her husband in confidence and make him believe that as long as she is with him, everything will go fine.
A man faces countless hurdles in the world he experiences on a daily basis. When he arrives home, he expects a caring a supportive wife who would help him go through tough situations. Therefore, show respect for his emotions and feelings, show him that his stress is yours too.
Don’t complain to him about the things he is unable to give you. A man always looks for providing the best to his family. He fights unknown wars and gives you all he has so always show him how happy he makes you by giving small things.
Never let him feel bad about his choice. Accept his gifts with an open heart and tell him how much his surprises and presents mean to you. Use the things he gives in front of him and keep them safe. Support him emotionally.
5. Understand Him:
Be happy with the things that make him happy. Most of the women complain that their husbands spend a lot of time with their friends. Well, to all the ladies reading this, this is known as ‘personal space’.
Give him his personal space. Respect him enough to let him have some ‘me time’ which is mostly with his friends. This does not mean he doesn’t value you or thinks of his friends more important than you. This is him just being him.
Let him do that and get adjusted to this. He will soon notice how happy you are living the life in his way. Of course, your efforts will not go in vain. These small gestures will make him feel respected and in return, he will treat you respectfully as well.
Make him feel like the king and he will make all his efforts to keep you like his queen. He should be known his worth and the significance of the thoughts you have for him.
6. Ask for His Opinion:
Whenever you are stuck in a situation where you become incapable of thinking with your own mind, take his opinion. Involve him in your problems. Keeping him in the ups down of your life will make him the importance he holds in your life. He is the head of the house. He should be known to the problems of your life and you shall make him feel the power is in his hands.
Respect his decisions and let him put forward his point of view. Even if you don’t agree with his thoughts, don’t underestimate him. Discuss the matter with him so he would know that his words matter to you.
Also, keep an eye on his choices whether it is about food or clothes. Try to please him by cooking his favorite dishes and wearing the colors and clothes he had picked for you when you went shopping with him. When he finds such importance of his words and choices, he will feel immense pleasure having you as a wife by his side.
By reading the above tips, it must have been for you as a wife to treat him respectfully. You might have got an idea of where the problem lies in your arguments with. A man asks for just a few things. These things are small when spelled but really big when practiced. These things are based on emotions and feelings. And a relationship is solely based upon feelings.
A man needs his wife to show respect for him for the hard work he does, not only for his family but for his wife as well. He truly looks for all the possible ways to keep his wife happy as he knows she is someone he had brought from the other house, she is now his responsibility. He cares how hard she works at home performing all the chores just to keep his needs fulfilled; he knows she goes through a lot when she tries to adjust in his home.
Therefore, she is ought to respect her husband when he provides his wife with everything he has. All he ever earns is for the woman who takes care of her husband and his children.
A woman has a big duty on her shoulders of the atmosphere of the house. She can make a home garden filled with love and happiness and she can make it like a fireball where there is nothing but hatred and hard feelings for each other.
Being a wife, he shall promote love and peace in her home by keeping a balanced relationship with her husband. If the roots are strong, the plant lasts longer and gives tasty fruit. Similarly, if the basis of the relationship between husband and wife is strong, the family grows stronger with the support of love, understanding and most importantly respect as described above.
When a healthy relationship between the partners originates; it automatically puts forward a great example for the children who see their parents living with a great understanding level.
As a good wife, a woman has been promised with beautiful rewards in the hereafter. Thus, if she makes her husband happy, she makes her Allah happy which is undoubtedly the biggest achievement for a Mominah.
Perfectly described. Believe me as a husband this is all I have wanted. Sadly, my ex wife she used to always complain after coming from office, she saw some new dress from her sister of aunts and she must buy it no matter how much I politely with a smile tells her that you already have enough dresses and there gonna be new dress coming every day that doesn’t mean you have to buy those. For simple matter she used to forgots all the things I did for her and tell me I didn’t love at her all. Instead of appreciation, she talk with mom and her mom teaches her how to control a husband ?! Oh Allah ! why husband wife should control each other? rather should’t we save each other’s back and be supportive? What is written in the article trust me we really appreciate those from our wife. Sadly it didn’t happened in my case. May Allah keep something better for me in the future.