is love before marriage allowed?

is love before marriage allowed ?

This article is about Relationship with non-mehram/ Love before Marriage….

“Right is right even if no one is doing it; wrong is wrong even if everyone is doing it”

goes the famous saying. In context of Islam, we can streamline it as – Haram is Haram no matter how widely accepted or practiced it is…

Love before marriage is Haram. Relationship with any non-mehram is totally Haram in Islam.

Talking or chatting with any non-mehram outside professional matters is prohibited in Islam. No matter how much someone feels important to you, or how muchyou love  that person, these are not legitimate excuses to speak to the opposite gender..

Without Nikkah its Haram, no two ways about it

Don’t please your Nafs. The pleasure of Nafs is temporary;but the grief, sorrows and guilt from such an act lasts forever, and on top of that we are committing a sin, a major disobedience of ALLAH, our creator, and His commandments.

ALLAH Subhana Wa Ta’ala says in the Quran:

“And of everything We have created pairs” [51:49]

The message is clear as daylight. Then why is everyone so hasty today?

Can’t such people wait for the Halal one when he/she has been pre-written by the creator himself?

Can’t he/she wait for the one whom ALLAH has chosen already for him/her?

Do they not have trust in ALLAH that like other things, he would have created the perfect match for you also.

In Quran ALLAH Subhana Wa Ta’ala says :

“And We have created you in pairs” [49:13]..

Is this statement is not enough for you to have faith in the destiny ALLAH has defined for him?

Is there anyone who can claim to be more trustworthy and helping than ALLAH?

Indeed no one.

Then why are so many men and women is in so much haste for a relationship that they become involved in haram relation.

Let me clear one thing that Islam is not against liking or loving someone. In fact Islam gives permission to men/women to choose the person he/she likes for Nikkah. Islam just sets some rules and creates some limits which are for betterment of the society.

In Islam even women has permission to like someone and can propose him if she likes him.

We just need to understand the limits and act accordingly.

If you have developed a liking for someone, then first step is to make dua for a betterment in this dunya and akhira and after dua do Istekhara. If after istekhara you get positive answer from ALLAH, through dream or firm belief in the heart that I should proceed, then do your best for marrying him/her.

Insha ALLAH, ALLAH will help you. ALLAH will make a way for you.

And remember, do Nikkah, because Nikkah is Sunnah. Avoid modern extravagant marriage ceremonies.

The Holy Prophet Sallallahu Alahi Wa’ali Wassalam said,

“Nikah is my Sunnah and one is who disobeys my Sunnah does not belong to me.”

True love starts after Nikkah.

Let me reiterate, in Islam it is not allowed that any two non-mehram to speak to each other with the hope that we will have Nikkah, that one day we will be together, in the process they keep on contacting and talking. It has been a very common phenomena these days with modern communication tools.

No, it is not allowed at all in Islam.

Islam says if you like someone, do Nikkah.

And if you are engaged, you are still non-mehram to each other. You have to follow these rules.

ALLAH’s plans are the best, we have to trust in ALLAH. ALLAH does not do anything before time nor after time, He does what He wants to do at the proper and perfect time.

Just wait for the right time, right moment and for the right person. You can pray that you get the right person soon, but engaging in Haram activities till that person comes is not the way to go.

Just pray, and ALLAH will make a way one day.

No need to stress over your future, if you can just pray and struggle, you should leave the rest on ALLAH and keep at peace about yourself

Anyone who is involved with a non-mehran, I would request him to please leave your Haram relationship for ALLAH, and put your trust in Him, surely ALLAH will give you what you want and what’s best for you.

As a Muslim it is our duty to follow ALLAH‘s commandments, follow Prophet’s  (Peace Be Upon Him) Sunnah, then our life in this world and in the next world would be great, without a doubt.

If anyone of you are at a wrong path, then don’t worry ALLAH‘s Mercy is very vast. ALLAH‘s love is greater than you could imagine. Just come back to ALLAH and seek His forgiveness, indeed ALLAH is Most Forgiving and Most Merciful.


From a sister,

Hoorain Sheikh

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May Allah SWT bless all Muslim brothers and sisters with happiness in their family life!  

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