Consequences of Being a Workaholic
A pious man decided to marry a pious girl, his family knows. He made his choice because she was nice, loving, caring and on top of that she was a virtuous lady. Both families were happy and the couple had a happy wedding according to the Islamic law, full of laughs, joy and serenity.
He was working as an employee when he got married. The blessing of his wedding made him more hard-working, as he wanted to ensure financial stability. The newly wed assisted her husband, she was taking care of her home, cooking, washing and other household, so that her husband always felt great and serene in the house.
One day, the husband told her wife that he got a promotion; he was named chief of the team, the company rewarded him for his continuous efforts. Therefore, his salary increases. The wife was extremely happy for her husband and was grateful to Allah for these blessings. But slowly, the man became arrogant. He had too much work, was always tired when came home, talked barely to his spouse and even neglected her. He even sometimes screamed at her that he was always working hard and nothing was done at home. He was just offloading his stress on his wife. She endured his swinging moods, trying to satisfy all his needs, and be obedient to him. He didn’t see her as a partner but treated her like an employee.
Day by day, the woman felt lonely, and ignored, assuming her husband didn’t love her anymore. She didn’t understand why his job was more important than her and the family. This situation made her sad and exhausted. The husband didn’t even realize that her wife was slowly getting depressed and she was putting a fake smile on her face every time he saw her.
She lost her self-esteem. She was all the time busy with the house, and the baby, while having no time for herself. She had nobody to talk with, to take her griefs away. She complained to Allah about her sadness, her vulnerability and made du’aas (prayers) to be granted more patience and be relieved from her melancholy.
One day, the wife’s mother came to visit her daughter while her husband traveled for his job. She welcomed her well but the mother felt that her daughter was not the joyful girl she was. She tempted to have discussion with her, but, the daughter was escaping the point. One evening the mother said, ‘I see your soul through your eyes. You seem so empty’. The woman couldn’t contain herself and cried. She just replied that she was exhausted from household chores. The mother suggested her to spend some days at their place to have some rest.
The wife was multiplying du’aas as she felt more and more neglected and sad. One night she woke up, prayed Fajr, thought about her situation and decided to accept her mother’s offer. She take permission from her husband, he was reluctant to let her go at first, but then, finally accepted under the conditions that she will stay no more than a week.
The first day she left, the man came back home and find himself great. Tranquility at its best. The next days were not so great. He realized that he missed his wife, she was taking care of the house; everything was clean, washed, and meals were always freshly prepared.
One day, he found a letter on the table of the living room, he didn’t see earlier. It was written by his wife before she left, explaining her distress, sadness and exhaustion of the situation, and that how he was neglecting her because of his over-commitment to his job.
He was astounded. He realized that he didn’t take his marriage duty seriously in front of Allah and towards his wife and began to regret his behavior.
When she came back home, she found him smiling at her. He welcomed her warmly, and said, ‘I apologize my dear wife, for all you have endured. I haven’t been good to you and I promise to change. I will support you in our day-to-day life and will maintain a balance between work and family. Allah has granted me a pious wife and many other blessings for which I was being ungrateful to. Please forgive me’.
She felt relieved, and prayed to Allah for listening to her prayers and blessing her immensely.
Written by
Sara B.
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May Allah SWT bless all Muslim brothers and sisters with happiness in their family life!
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He doesnt want him self to be with wife, thats why he is giving excuses that he already tried im sure hes lying. There r two foulty people in marriange not only one. And im sure that there is his foult as well but he is just ordinary man who wants to push all guilt on women.
its been 3 months since she left my place . I have been patient. She and her parents are not even communicating to me properly inspite of my efforts. I think I have gone through so much of pain because of marrying a girl from a family which does not understand the values of marriage. I dont think any chance of reconciliation is left. InshaAllah I will send the divorce letter to her after Ramadhan and end this agony of mine.
May Allah bring tranquility and chase away these demons out of my life and make a way for me to be happy.
Someone below suggested to warn, these days hypocrites don’t heed to warnings.
Hi.divorce is not the sulotion in islam.read the was of prophets Mohammed s.a.w.trust me they will change behaviour of them one day.the situation which ur facing that m facing sense 2years.
Prayer is guaranteed to bring tranquility and chase away worry.’ be patient, Allah I’ll make a way out for u and bless your marriage
Gone are the days of dutiful wives.
My wife never stays at home, is always at her parents home.
She never cooks for me. Always nags. Comes from a poor background but expects money and costly presents from me. Complaints about everything. Doesnt has manners and doesnt know how to behave among people. Disrespects me.
I am fed up of her and right now she is at her mothers house. I wish she never comes back and even if she comes I am thinking of divorcing her.
Brother, divorce is a the only halaal thing that Allāh dislikes.
I can understand ur problem , but request u to make duas for Allah can change anything within a blink .
Have patience , have tawakkul , Allah will definitely provide ur heart with piece .
Peace *
Why dont you just give her a warning first before opting for divorce.
Brother
Before thinking to divorce her, you must give her one more chance, and consult with some sheikh, how to do that
We can help you too
You are very unthankful heart. First change yourself give her what she deserves things will change by the grace of Allah. Wife is the first priority it doesn’t matter from which background she belongs. First change yourself
I am a girl.i have everything what I should do as a good wife.still my husband behave like a shaitan .her mother don’t want us to be together but still I am surviving because I don’t want to live this relationship.in my 2years of marriage my husband stayed with me only 4months aftr that he went back to abroad.i always ask him when he will be back but he always makes me fake promise s.but he didn’t come.now he wants to give divorce because his mother don’t want me in his life.but still m trying to save .my dear friend.divorce is not a good solution .being a girl I can understand what feelings I am getting.try to give one change to ur wife.take her out with you spend time with ur self.i am surprised to see that boys also surviving because of girls.may Allah help us.
Sounds like you are disrespecting her now. She has left you because you are not giving her the attention she deserves. Why should she expect a cheap gift from her husband. If you listen to her nags once then follow through it might be the best advise.