Marriage is a beautiful relationship. It takes a lot of effort to serve this relationship. It just seems easy to get married and built together, in fact, it is way more difficult to do so. When you get into marriage, you are no more a single person.
Your decisions are no more only yours, you have a partner to share every single detail of your life with. The earlier you learn to share your life with your spouse, the stronger your bond gets with the passage of time. There are some things mentioned below, which should not be missed out if you wish to strengthen your marriage:
1. Respect:
The foremost essential for a healthy marriage is respect for your spouse. There are many marriages where one of the spouses is not financially stable or he does not have a family. But that does not mean that he deserves less respect than those who are wealthy or have a strong family background.
There should be equal respect for each other. Neither the man should think any less for his wife. She should not be treated like a slave who is there just for his comfort and luxuries. Mostly women are the ones who suffer disrespectful behavior of their husbands. They are treated harshly and not given the respect they deserve. Our beloved Prophet said:
“Take my advice with regard to women. Act kindly towards women, for they were created from a rib, and the most crooked part of a rib is it’s uppermost. If you attempt to straighten; you will break it, and if you leave it alone it will remain crooked; so act kindly toward women.” [Al Bukhari and Muslims]
2. Equality:
Men and women are ought to treat each other equally in their married life. Neither a wife is the slave of her husband nor the husband is his woman’s boss. Marriage is a beautiful relationship defined by ALLAH in which both the persons and obliged to fulfill their responsibilities. It is a bond which if closely seen, balances both the people’s rights.
If a wife has responsibilities then she has some rights too. Similarly, if a husband has some responsibilities then he has some rights too. In this way, their relationship is balanced and no one is superior to each other. Therefore, the husband and wife should keep each other at the same level at which they think of themselves.
3. Care:
The emotion of being cared for is pleasant. Both persons should show care for each other. They both should be aware; if their partner is upset or going through a hard time. One should make sure they become a way of happiness in the other’s tough times.
They both should not only take care of each other in hard days but also stay aware of their needs all the time. It is the responsibility and the right of other of both people in a marriage to show the feeling of care for their partner.
4. Understanding:
There come many points in life when a person feels alone because he is not able to make people understand himself. That is the time when a person needs his partner the most. One should stand firm with his spouse when he feels low and understands whatever he is trying to say.
The key to understanding is not just for hard times but for normal days too. Both persons should be known to each other’s minds and thinking. If there are things between the partners that do not match then they should develop understanding and respect each other’s opinion rather than imposing yours.
5. Listen to your partner:
In this world, it is easier to talk than to listen. Listening is one of the biggest deficiencies most people have. When your partner is upset or feeling low, you should be the one listening to them.
They should feel the most comfortable with you when they want to share their personal matters with you that are troubling them. Sit and talk to whatever they are holding on to. Let them vent out. Relax them with your presence.
6. Give them your time:
One of the precious things that Allah has gifted to His people is time. Time is a state. It is a feeling. It carries so many memories, these memories could be bad and could be good 7. depending on how you spent it.
The one reason why time is so much important is that you can never bring it back. It is one of the costly things which cannot be bought or sold by money. Therefore, give your time to your partner. By spending time with your partner, you not only make them feel the richest person but also get to understand them more.
7. Eat with them:
Our Prophet always used to eat with his wife Khadija. Eating together increases the love and affection between both the partners. Sharing food increases the sense of care and responsibility. Nabi said:
“Eat together and not separately, for the blessing is associated with the company.”
[SUNAN IBN MAJAH]
8. Travel Together:
For a healthy living, both of the partners should always stay together and not leave each other. If you are a husband, then take your wife to the places she would love to see. Allah has made this world for His people. Discover it together. Go on traveling together and see His creations all over the world. Spend your money in witnessing his miracles.
9. Give Respect to each other’s families:
This is a very strong point which should be taken care of. Both the men and women, when sticks together through nikkah, not only sign the nikkah papers to get along with each other but they marry each other’s families as well.
Both the families are now bonded together through these two people. Show respect and care for each other’s family members and treat them as your own. This not only strengthens your relationship but also increases respect for each other.
10. Stay Patient:
Any relationship is strongly based upon how one controls themselves in anger when the other in an argument with the other person. Let us see this in the context of married life. It is believed that always the truth comes out in anger. Well, this might not be true in every case. Speaking of a healthy marriage, it is advised to stay patient in an argument. But we all know as we all are humans, the most difficult task is to stay quiet in a quarrel.
Therefore, if one of the partners is losing patience in argument then the other should stay calm and try to avoid any type of interaction with their spouse. This will gradually settle down the situation. If both the persons start to speak, it is going to create a mess and things will go the wrong direction. Allah’s last messenger said:
“When a husband and wife look at each other with love, Allah looks at them with mercy.”
[SAHIH BUKHARI]
These were some of the basic steps one should follow in order to live a happily married life. There are many problems a man faces because he is the one responsible for performing outdoor duties. In today’s century, it is not easy to handle all the responsibilities alone. Therefore, women should take care of their husbands.
They should be aware of his man’s needs and comfort. This is the best way a person can feel wanted and not ignored. He does the job, he feeds the children and runs the house with all he earns. He never lets the family know about the tensions he has in his mind all day. Everything he looks after is the happiness of his family and his wife.
Not only this, but a man has similar responsibilities to his wife. She doesn’t speak about the battles she fights all day. She leaves her home for the man she married to. She stays at home spending half of the day alone. She cooks for her husband irrespective of the weather conditions and her health issues. She gives birth to a child, she feeds the child(s). She sacrifices her own happiness for her comfort; for her family.
Thus, the husband should take care of the wife in every way. Fulfill her basic needs, bring her gifts and make her happy.
A wife and a husband, both have equal rights and responsibilities the other way round. If these all things are kept in focus, then the marriage will last happily. This is not a myth, it is a reality if you obey the things mentioned above. Allah has created this relationship of marriage for the husbands and wives to become each other’s shield in hard times.
To laugh with each other in good times. This life is a gift of Allah given just once to all of us, therefore, we spend it with staying happy and fulfilling His commands. He will shower you with countless blessings. A happy marriage is one of those blessings too. Make sure you earn it by your good deeds.
Apart from making all these efforts to make their marriage stronger, people must read the dua for marriage problems as well.
Apart from making all these efforts to make their marriage stronger, people must read the dua for marriage problems as well. It is a prayer that helps people in solving all their marriage-related problems.
Well done very interesting and educative Jzk
Good article very true