Wives should be praised
When in relation with someone, you develop feelings for them. When you start looking at someone’s qualities, affection takes place in our heart. Therefore, if you just keep finding the good attributes of your wife, you’ll ultimately fall in love with her. Praise her every now and then and she’ll love you even more.
As Dr. Abdul Hayi (rehmatullah aleyh) says;
“one who thinks that his wife cooks for him and that it’s her courteous attitude that she does everything for him, will praise and admire her cooking and will encourage her. But if someone treats his wife like a maid or a slave and believes that cooking is her responsibility, he will never appreciate his wife’s good cooking and will pull out a huge fight over petty mistakes like increment of salt or lack of sugar to his taste.’’
Women by nature are softhearted. A few words of appreciation can be overwhelming for them. They’ll attempt to perform the task even more deftly for which they were commended in the first place. So try to explain everything in a positive manner to her. Whatever she does correctly, as guided by you, praise her for that and if she fails to fulfill the chore efficiently, guide her in such a way that her chances to commit the same mistakes are reduced.
From now onward, make it your habit to regard your wife with admiration no matter how little the task is. When she makes you a cup of tea or presents you a glass of water, praise her by saying ‘jazakillah khair’ (may Allah reward you for this).
Be grateful to her not just verbally but with all your heart as well and eventually you will see your wife cherishing you more than ever. You’ll find a nymph in this world in the form of your wife. This is how a couple can make their home like heaven on earth.
Remember! A human has a psychological need to be approved and encouraged for the good he does and this need emerges more when he is being dispirited publicly. Especially when in-laws of a woman are continuously interrupting her and keeping an eye on her flaws, that is no less than maltreatment for her.
A person who is not admired for his work and his excellence is not acknowledged neither a single word of gratitude is said to him, nor he’s being disheartened, that person loses his strength and become depressed. In a nutshell, value and praise the work of your wife and if Allah wills, you’ll receive the same cooperation in return.
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